Sunday, March 31, 2013

So much for hoping.

Well, things didn't go exactly as I had hoped for. I went to the neurologist on Tuesday. I feel so relaxed and calm there since I know that I will be treated right and not like I'm faking anything or have everything downplayed. We got back to the exam room. I was feeling tired, so I rested my head on my hand and closed my eyes. The next thing I remembered was waking up with people in the room and hooked up to an EEG. Not exactly how I expected the day to go.

When I came to completely, he talked to me about what he wanted to happen. He said he wanted me on a "drug vacation" to keep me in as little pain as possible for a little while in hopes that it would reset my body. He believes that all my pain, plus my nervous system being so out of whack from everything, is what is causing me to pass out and have the seizures. He did say that the shunt wouldn't hurt but it wasn't necessary right now. He went out and attempted to call my doctors. The neurosurgeons and my family doctor were on vacation. He managed to get ahold of my pain doctor that I was already scheduled to see the next morning. We could hear him talking to him on the phone, explaining what was going on with me, and what he wanted to do to get my body under control. Everything seemed like it was going to go smoothly.

Wednesday was a busy day for us. I had my pain management appointment. We left early so we could get in early since we had to get back to my husband's work so he could reenlist. We got in really quick and the new PA seemed awesome. She started talking like she was going to follow through with the neurologist's plan. She left the room to go talk to the doctor. The next thing I know, she comes back in saying that the doctor would not follow through with the plan and that they wanted me to get a psychological evaluation. WTH!!! That is the point where I had to hold back as much as I could from flipping out. I kept my cool and talked to the doctor while he proceeded to talk like he was just treating me for headaches. ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? I told him, I don't just have headaches. I am also not here to just get pills because I'm some kind of junkie. I asked him if he thought that was my case. He told me that he didn't think that and started blaming everything on the neurologist. "All he did was talk and wouldn't give me a change to respond. I don't believe what he wants done is the right thing. I wouldn't be able to go home and lay my head down and feel like I did the right thing." He talked to me and talked to me and talked to me. He finally said he could release me and the neurologist could do what he wanted. I finally had to tell him that that is what I wanted to do and we needed to leave so my husband could get back to work.

The whole time this was going on, I was on hold with the neurologist's assistant. They had told me the day before that if I had any problems to call them. Luckily, we had time to spare because they wanted me to come straight over. We left and went straight there. The offices are only a few minutes away from each other. I went and signed in and explained what was going on. The receptionist called back to see where they wanted me to be. I was squeezed in with the assistant. They printed out my current meds like they always due. This time, it listed the new medicine instead of the old one. I felt so much relief after all the stress we had been through. They want to see me back on Wednesday to see how I am doing. So far the meds don't seem to be making much of a difference, not to mention the fact that the patch is irritating the hell out of my skin.

We finally got the appointments out of the way and head back to the base to reenlist. NOPE! The guy that was supposed to do it's wife had their baby that day. He didn't print out the paperwork so the new woman could do it. She told us, "Let me get your number and we will let you know when we can do it." It was just a bad day to say the least. My wonderful hubby then dropped me off at home, and went to get my prescription filled. At first, I could feel a little bit starting to kick in and then it just made me tired. Ever since, not much of a change. I am still in so much pain. I'm still having issues with my hands/legs, my hands are swelling so badly and are more numb than ever, the pressure is killing me, the headaches are getting worse and more frequent, my body is just on a downward spiral. Hopefully the neurologist will get this under control. I don't know how many more days like this I can handle. Wondering if I'm going to be able to move, wondering if I'm going to pass out or have a seizure, wondering if I am going to be able to even do the smallest things for my family. I want to give up on all of it so bad some times, but I know that I have to keep fighting for not only myself, but for my son and husband.

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